As a Montessori school, we are proud of our mixed-age classrooms that foster community, cooperation, and empathy among students. The opportunity for self-directed learning and freedom of choice not only boosts self-esteem and confidence but also nurtures a sense of agency, all of which are vital to positive mental health.

Honoring individual differences and avoiding comparisons creates a supportive environment where children feel valued and accepted.  Practical life skills promote independence, self-care, and a sense of competence, which enhance children’s self-confidence and emotional resilience. 

We incorporate lessons and activities that promote social-emotional skills, such as conflict resolution, communication, and empathy. Children learn to recognize and regulate their emotions, understand others’ perspectives, and navigate social interactions successfully.

When children experiencing emotional distress receive support from caring adults, they are better able to build a strong foundation for emotional well-being. 

As May is Mental Health Awareness Month, we want to share ways to support your child’s emotional well-being. 

Did you know that hugs lasting 6 seconds or more are best for soothing our minds and calming our bodies?

In Gretchen Rubin’s book The Happiness Project, it is explained that as hugging time elapses, levels of the oxytocin hormone increase.

Oxytocin (the “feel-good hormone”) calms the nervous system and boosts positive emotions. The flow of oxytocin after a six-second hug has some positive effects.

According to Rubin:

• It lowers blood pressure and helps with anxiety
• It lowers cortisol (the stress hormone)
• It increases your social connections and sense of belonging.

Did you also know that laughter really is the best medicine?

According to Maria Heveran, a physician assistant at Geisinger’s Lewisburg clinic, your body releases feel-good chemicals called endorphins when you laugh. “Releasing endorphins can help increase the body’s natural painkilling response,” says Heveran. “This helps with chronic pain and can improve your mood.”

As we approach summer, let’s remember the power of hugs and laughter. These simple acts can bring immense joy and contribute to our children’s emotional well-being. So, take a moment to hug your children a little longer and find the joy in laughter! 

Parents and teachers are essential in helping children explore their feelings and build a strong emotional well-being foundation by promoting nurturing relationships.

Books for adults:

Reader’s Digest Laughter is the Best Medicine: All Time Favorites: The funniest jokes, stories, and cartoons from 100 years of Reader’s Digest.

The Happiness Project

Books for children:

My Joyful Robot

Be Mindful of Monsters: A Book for Helping Children Accept Their Emotions

The Feelings Book: The Care and Keeping of Your Emotions

Guy Stuff Feelings: Everything you need to know about your emotions

If you’re feeling worried about your child’s mental health, it’s more than okay to ask for support!

Resources:

• InfoAboutKids.org has resources addressing children’s healthy development across four areas: body, mind, emotions, and relationships. 
• National Child Traumatic Stress Network (nctsn.org) has resources, materials, and tools to help you support children impacted by trauma. 
• Effective Child Therapy (effectivechildtherapy.org) and the National Alliance on Mental Illness (nami.org) provide resources, support, and referrals. 
• The Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration’s samhsa.gov/nd-help and 1-800-662-HELP hotline are confidential, free, 24/7 information services that offer referrals to local treatment facilities, support groups, and community-based organizations. 

Compiled by The American Psychological Association (www.apa.org/topics/children).

This month’s Family Connection Newsletter discusses the three-period lesson in Montessori education, a fundamental daily tool to present new information to children. The three periods are naming, recognizing, and remembering. Édouard Séguin, a physician and educator who worked with neurodivergent children, developed the three-period lesson and inspired Maria Montessori. Montessori teachers at all levels use the three-period lesson.

The article also discusses the power of an apology, how to encourage children to empathize with others, and how to help them begin to understand the value and meaning of making amends.

Warm regards,

Karen Sankey
Director of Montessori Education

Our parent education events for the school year are coming to a close.

We have one more on the topic of Family Meetings, scheduled for Thursday, May 23, at 8:30 after drop-off.

We hope the impact of our shared learning and collaboration empowered you with effective communication and discipline strategies, nurturing healthy and more harmonious relationships within the family as we have seen Positive Discipline’s impact in our classrooms. 

Positive Discipline’s focus on mutual respect, encouragement, effective communication, and fostering independence makes it a great fit for both home and our Montessori school classrooms.

Some of the big takeaways from our Parent Education talks this year include:

Mistaken Goals of Children’s Behavior: 

We talked about why children do things that might seem wrong, like trying to get too much attention, too much power, or getting back at someone. We learned that it’s because they have feelings and needs that aren’t being met or they’re feeling upset about something, not because they’re being “naughty” on purpose. We learned how to figure out what’s really going on and how to respond kindly instead of punitively.

Reflective Listening: 

We learned how important it is to really listen and understand our children. We talked about “reflective listening,” where we repeat back what our children say to show them we hear them and care about their feelings. We also learned some tips for being better listeners, like making eye contact and not interrupting.

Non-verbal Cues: 

We learned how our body language, like how we stand or move our hands, can say a lot to our children. We also talked about how a child’s body language can tell us how they’re feeling, even if they don’t say anything. We learned how to pay attention to these signals and how to respond to them.

Karen and I are looking forward to seeing you in May and sharing what we learned about Family Meetings!

“The satisfaction which they find in their work has given them a grace and ease like that which comes from music.” ~Maria Montessori, The Discovery of the Child

April’s edition of the American Montessori Society’s Family Connection Newsletter delves into human tendencies in relation to the Montessori method. You will learn about the eleven cardinal tendencies that Maria Montessori identified as driving humans to understand and make a difference in the world: orientation, order, exploration, communication, activity, manipulation, work, repetition, exactness, abstraction, and perfection. Knowledge of these human tendencies allows adults opportunities to prepare our children’s environments to be places that promote growth in learning and exploration.

The newsletter also provides helpful information about the differences between praise and acknowledgment in your home.

I hope this month’s newsletter is helpful to you.

Warm regards,

Karen Sankey
Director of Montessori Education

“Education is a natural process carried out by the child and is not acquired by listening to words but by experiences in the environment.” ~Maria Montessori

The topic of this month’s Family Connection Newsletter from the American Montessori Society is the reasoning mind of the elementary student.

According to Montessori education, the period from birth to age six is known as the absorbent mind, while ages six to twelve are all about the reasoning mind. This is the stage where children take in information through conscious work and memory, and make decisions based on logic and patterns that they have already established in the brain.

Some key attributes of this stage are conscious learning, enthusiasm for learning, the importance of social connection, and the child’s great interest in justice.

I hope you find this information helpful, and I wish you a wonderful March Break!

Best regards,

Karen Sankey
Director of Montessori Education

Choosing a favorite exercise from the Positive Discipline parenting library is not easy, but family meetings hold a special place at the top for me. These gatherings around the kitchen table offer children a valuable and enriched learning experience. Family meetings cover important skills like listening, expressing appreciation, respecting differences, problem-solving, focusing on solutions, and understanding the positives of mistakes. 

Reflecting on a personal anecdote, there was a time when my boys, in their early teen years, began convening family meetings before my husband and I to discuss things as a family.

In school, your child may already be actively involved in Class Meetings. Positive Discipline Class Meetings are similar to Family Meetings. Class Meetings and Family Meetings are powerful tools for fostering communication, problem-solving, and positive relationships within their respective settings. They create collaboration, learning, and growth opportunities, ultimately contributing to a more harmonious and supportive environment.

Despite the clear benefits, the question arises: why do many families find family meetings challenging? Part of the issue might be insufficient training, with parents expecting children to possess the necessary skills for effective family meetings right from the start. 

To learn more about facilitating effective family meetings, please join us at our next Parent Education event—date and time to be determined. 

Karen and I hope to see you there!

Gina Tryforos ~ Assistant Head of School | Student Support Coordinator

“Our work is not to teach, but to help the absorbent mind in its work of development. How marvelous it would be if by our help, if by an intelligent treatment of the child, if by understanding the needs of his physical life and by feeding his intellect, we could prolong the period of functioning of the absorbent mind!” -Maria Montessori, The Absorbent Mind

This month’s Family Connection newsletter does a nice job of explaining the period of intense mental activity called the absorbent mind that children experience during the first six years of their lives. You will learn what the absorbent mind is and how best to support children during this period of development. The newsletter also contains some great tips for cooking with your young child.

I hope you find this Family Connection useful and informative.

Have a great weekend,
Karen Sankey

As we’ve discussed, Positive Discipline is an approach to parenting and teaching that focuses on encouraging desirable behaviors and fostering a sense of responsibility, respect, and problem-solving in children. The concept of belonging and significance is the cornerstone of Positive Discipline.

Children who feel they belong are happier, more relaxed, and have fewer behavioral problems than others. They are also more motivated and more successful learners.

At our most recent parent education event, we talked about the Mistaken Goals of Children’s Behavior. 

The Mistaken Goals of Children’s Behavior is a concept within Positive Discipline that suggests children may display challenging behaviors to meet certain psychological or emotional needs. 

These mistaken goals are divided into four categories:

Undue Attention: Children may misbehave to gain attention, even if it’s negative attention because they feel neglected or unseen.

The mistaken Goal is – Undue Attention (to keep others busy or to get special service)

The belief behind the child’s behavior is:

I count (belong) only when I’m being noticed or getting special service. I’m only important when I’m keeping you busy with me.

Power: Some children may act out to gain a sense of power or control, often when they feel powerless or overwhelmed in other areas of their lives.

The Mistaken Goal is– Misguided Power (to be boss)

The belief behind the child’s behavior is:

I belong only when I’m boss, in control, or proving no one can boss me. You can’t make me.

Revenge: Children might display challenging behavior to get back at others, seeking revenge for perceived wrongs or injustices they have experienced.

The Mistaken Goal is –Revenge (to get even)

The belief behind the child’s behavior is:

I don’t think I belong, so I’ll hurt others as I feel hurt. I can’t be liked or loved.

Assumed Inadequacy: In this case, children may adopt a defeated attitude and engage in misbehavior because they feel incapable, insecure, or incompetent.

The Mistaken Goal is – Assumed Inadequacy (to give up and be left alone)

The belief behind the child’s behavior is:

I can’t belong because I’m not perfect, so I’ll convince others not to expect anything from me. I am helpless and unable; it’s no use trying because I won’t do it right.

Once the mistaken goals are identified, adults can begin to take action to redirect the student’s purposes and help start better behavior.

Strategies might include:

• Offering positive attention and reinforcement for appropriate behavior.
• Providing choices and autonomy to meet the need for power constructively.
• Teaching problem-solving skills and alternatives to seeking revenge.
• Helping the student build the skills and confidence to face and overcome challenges rather than avoiding them.

All children misbehave. Positive Discipline encourages parents and educators to identify the underlying needs or goals behind a child’s behavior and respond constructively to address those needs. 

Instead of resorting to punitive measures, Positive Discipline promotes effective communication, problem-solving, and cooperation to help children develop social and emotional skills. 

By understanding and addressing the mistaken goals, adults can create a positive and supportive environment that fosters healthy development in children.

Warmly,

Gina Tryforos

Assistant Head of School-Student Support Coordinator