“Learning to use the toilet is a natural process that begins when your child’s desire to be grown up and his neurological development have reached the point where he can control his bladder and bowels. We don’t train children to use the toilet, we support them when they are ready.” (How to Raise an Amazing Child: The Montessori way to bring up caring confident children, by Tim Seldin)
With summer being just around the corner, we have received a few questions about toilet learning. Here are some Montessori tips:
-Once the child is showing interest in using the toilet, the bathroom can be set up to give the child as much independence as possible. Keeping a supply of dry clothes in the bathroom is convenient. Consider a stool so that the child can reach both the toilet and sink. Rags for cleaning up can be helpful.
When a child has involvement in the process, the child has ownership of the process too, not the adult.
-Incorporate using the toilet into the child’s routine. Invite them to sit on the toilet upon waking, before going out, after lunch, etc.
-Choose clothing that supports independence. Clothing needs to be easy to put on and take off. Bottoms need to be loose-fitting to make it easier to independently pull up and push down (i.e., no skinny jeans). Elastic waistbands are great. Your toddler also needs to be able to remove clothes quickly to make it to the toilet in time. It can be difficult to push clothes down quickly if they are too small/tight or if there are buttons, snaps, or buckles to undo first.
–Because children are in control of whether or not they use the toilet, the language you use with your child is very important. The goal is to empower them and their growing desire for independence without starting a power struggle or inadvertently causing feelings of shame or failure.
When they don’t make it in time…
If a child becomes wet, stay calm and reassuring. For example, you might say, “I see you are wet. Let’s go get some dry clothes.” Your child can get them from the supply in the bathroom and even help wipe the floor and wash their hands. Let them change at their own pace and provide help if they ask or if they are overwhelmed.
It is important to create a supportive, respectful environment that encourages your child’s natural progression toward toilet independence. We are always happy to answer questions or offer guidance with toileting.
Highlights from our week:
The caterpillars have started to form chrysalises. The children have been very excited to observe the changes. We can’t wait to see what will happen next!
We explored kiwi this week as our Food Tasting experience. It was well-received!
We’ve been learning the names of birds and insects.
We celebrated a friend’s 2nd birthday and read one of his favorite books, Dragons Love Tacos. Then we shared a special birthday snack of Milano cookies.
It was a great week! Enjoy the weekend with your families.
-Christine & Lizette
